What to do when they need a lot of help

When caring for someone with dementia who needs significant assistance with daily activities like eating and mobility, family members can take several practical steps to provide support:

Create a Structured Routine

Establishing a consistent daily schedule can help reduce confusion and anxiety for the person with dementia. This routine should include:

  • Regular mealtimes

  • Consistent wake-up and bedtime hours

  • Scheduled activities and rest periods

Assist with Eating

Mealtime strategies:

  • Serve foods that are easy to chew and swallow

  • Cut food into small, manageable pieces

  • Use adaptive utensils if needed, such as spoons with larger handles

  • Offer one food at a time to avoid overwhelming choices

  • Provide gentle reminders and cues to continue eating

Encourage independence:

  • Allow extra time for meals

  • Sit with them and eat together to model eating behaviors

  • Offer finger foods when appropriate to promote self-feeding

Support Mobility

Safe movement:

  • Install handrails and grab bars in key areas of the home

  • Remove tripping hazards like loose rugs or clutter

  • Ensure good lighting throughout the living space

  • Use a gait belt when assisting with walking, if recommended by a healthcare professional

Encourage exercise:

  • Engage in gentle exercises together, such as short walks or seated movements

  • Use physical activities as opportunities for social interaction

Simplify Tasks

Break down complex activities into smaller, manageable steps. For instance, when dressing:

  1. Lay out clothes in the order they should be put on

  2. Provide clear, one-step instructions

  3. Assist as needed, but encourage independence where possible

Maintain Dignity

Always strive to preserve the person's sense of self-worth:

  • nvolve them in decisions when possible

  • Offer choices, even if limited (e.g., "Would you like to wear the blue shirt or the green one?")

  • Speak to them directly, not about them to others in their presence

Ensure Safety

Home modifications:

  • Secure potentially dangerous items like medications or cleaning supplies

  • Install safety locks on cabinets and doors as needed

  • Consider using monitoring devices for wandering prevention

Provide Sensory Stimulation

Engage multiple senses to help maintain cognitive function:

  • Play familiar music

  • Offer textured objects to touch

  • Use aromatherapy with familiar scents

Practice Patience and Flexibility

Remember that abilities may fluctuate from day to day. Be prepared to adjust your approach as needed and remain calm and reassuring, even in challenging moments. By implementing these strategies, family members can provide comprehensive support for their loved one with dementia, enhancing their quality of life and maintaining their dignity throughout the progression of the disease. 

Source: UCSF

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