How to help when your loved one has thinking problems - it gets hard for them to understand things

When someone with dementia experiences thinking problems, it becomes harder for them to think clearly, follow conversations, or understand things. Family members can offer support in several ways. Below are tips, actions, recommendations, and examples of what you can do and say in these situations:

1. Keep Communication Simple and Clear

  • What to Say: "Let’s take this step by step." or “Can you show me how you do that?”

  • Action: Use simple language, short sentences, and give one instruction at a time. Break down complex tasks into smaller, manageable steps.

  • Why: Simplifying language makes it easier for them to process information without feeling overwhelmed.

2. Offer Visual and Physical Cues

  • What to Say: “Would you like me to show you how?”

  • Action: Demonstrate what you want them to do rather than relying on verbal instructions alone. For example, if they’re having trouble with a task like getting dressed, gently guide their hands to start the action.

  • Why: Visual cues and physical assistance can help them understand tasks better than verbal explanations alone.

3. Provide Gentle Guidance and Reassurance

  • What to Say: “It’s okay if it takes a little longer, I’m here to help.”

  • Action: If they seem confused, calmly guide them through tasks. If they make a mistake, reassure them that it’s okay. Be patient and avoid rushing them.

  • Why: This helps reduce stress and anxiety. Reassurance can restore confidence and help them stay calm.

4. Minimize Distractions

  • Action: Turn off the TV, close the door, or move to a quiet space when explaining something or helping them with a task.

  • Why: A quiet environment without distractions makes it easier for them to focus and think clearly.

5. Stick to a Routine

  • Action: Create a predictable daily routine that includes regular times for meals, activities, and rest.

  • Why: Routines help reduce confusion and provide a sense of stability. When things are predictable, it’s easier for them to follow along.

6. Break Down Complex Tasks

  • What to Say: “Let’s start with this first, and then we’ll do the next step together.”

  • Action: Break down tasks like making tea, dressing, or using the phone into smaller steps, and guide them through one step at a time.

  • Why: Simplifying complex tasks into smaller steps makes them easier to complete and reduces frustration.

7. Offer Choices, Not Open-Ended Questions

  • What to Say: “Would you like coffee or tea?” instead of “What would you like to drink?”

  • Action: Limit options to two or three clear choices rather than open-ended questions. This helps them avoid confusion and decision-making fatigue.

  • Why: Giving too many choices or asking open-ended questions can be overwhelming and difficult for them to process.

8. Use Memory Aids

  • Action: Label drawers, cabinets, or household items to help them locate things easily. Use a large calendar or whiteboard to note important tasks and appointments.

  • Why: Visual memory aids like labels or calendars help them stay oriented and remember daily tasks or routines.

9. Encourage Engagement in Meaningful Activities

  • What to Say: “How about we work on this puzzle together?” or “Let’s take a walk in the garden.”

  • Action: Engage them in simple, enjoyable activities like gardening, drawing, or sorting items. Choose activities they have enjoyed in the past that don’t require intense thinking.

  • Why: Keeping their mind active with low-pressure, familiar activities helps maintain cognitive function and promotes emotional well-being.

10. Respond with Patience

  • What to Say: “Take your time, there’s no rush.”

  • Action: Encourage them to take as much time as needed to complete a task or respond to a question.

  • Why: Rushing them or showing frustration can make thinking problems worse. Patience fosters a calm environment, which helps with clarity.

11. Involve Them in Conversations

  • What to Say: “What do you think about that?” or “How does that sound to you?”

  • Action: Keep them engaged in conversations, even if they struggle to follow. Speak slowly, make eye contact, and give them time to respond.

  • Why: Engaging them in conversation helps keep their cognitive abilities stimulated and prevents feelings of isolation.

12. Encourage Rest and Relaxation

  • Action: Ensure they get enough rest and have time for relaxation. If they seem mentally fatigued, allow them to rest and revisit the task later.

  • Why: Fatigue can exacerbate thinking difficulties, and rest can help them regain clarity.

13. Use Positive Reinforcement

  • What to Say: “You did a great job with that!” or “That was really helpful, thank you.”

  • Action: Praise them for their efforts, even small achievements.

  • Why: Positive reinforcement boosts confidence and encourages them to continue trying, even when thinking becomes difficult.

14. Consult Professionals

  • Action: If their thinking problems become more severe or interfere significantly with daily life, consult a healthcare provider or occupational therapist for additional strategies and support.

  • Why: Professionals can offer tailored advice on cognitive exercises, medication, or interventions that may improve cognitive function.

By breaking down tasks, providing reassurance, and creating a supportive environment, family members can help a person with dementia manage thinking problems and maintain their quality of life.

Source: Alzheimer’s Association

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